A Professional Mistress, B&D is Her Lifestyle!

In 2001 I joined a Yahoo group owned by Tyra Knotts, upon joining, I posted my introduction and was banned from her group for being a Professional Dominatrix. In the past three years she continues to join my groups, posts her links, messages and I keep banning her. She posts as many as 3 to 4 links per week. I'm getting tired of it, I'm getting tired of her attitude towards the Professional Dominatrix, yet she has the gall to come into my groups, on a weekly basis and post her links. Is she trying to learn from the Professionals that frequent my groups??? No, she is appalled by the Professional... she says, " We are unlike as champagne and water." Ok, you're entitled to your opinion, but why keep coming into my groups??? Miss Knotts has posted articles by Professional Mistresses, such as the Nine Levels of submission by D.N. Vera (first written for Dominant Mystique Newspaper in 1983), which I never agreed with. Miss Vera had only a few months experience at the time she wrote article on the different levels, if there are any... Lenny Burtman fought for the rights of the Leather Community in court in the 1950's and 1960's, his wife Mistress Jennifer Jordan was a professional Mistress! Many Professional Mistresses have fought in court for our rights in the Leather Community and to fight social prejudices that still exist today. The fact remains, she doesn't like the Professional Mistress because we are not Lifestyle Mistresses??? I have news for you, B&D is a LIFESTYLE for the Professional Mistress. Being a Professional means being Dominatrix 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. I know, I've been a professional Mistress since 1975! A lot is owed to the Professional Mistress, if it wasn't for these Professional Mistresses who have paved the way for us, B&D would not be where it is today. Before the internet the only way to contact or make contact with someone was through the B&D Magazines and Newspapers. And those B&D publications were financed 99% by Ads from Professional Mistresses. Without them, the scene would not have evolved as quickly as it did, nor the way it did. Here's what Miss Knotts wrote to me...

THANK YOU! I prefer not to be in groups founded by Pro Domme. We are as unlike as champagne and water....and you can guess which we pure lifestyle Domme consider ourselves.

There is a need for pro Domme since there aren't enough of the real ones to go around who work for a living and do it for the love of the lifestyle, not because we have to buy a new car or get more plastic surgery.

Tyra

--- MMP Group Sites < MMPGroupSites@verizon.net > wrote:

Then don't come into my groups anymore, every time I see you there, you are banned. Mistress Michelle

----- Original Message -----
From: "ravensbrook Moderator"
Sent: Saturday, January 29, 2005 8:35 PM
Subject: File - Letter to denied members

Sorry, for one or more of the reasons listed below, your membership to Ravensbrook - a Correctional Facility role play group has been denied:

• Your profile is not in English
• Your age and/or gender is not in your profile
• The e-mail address you are attempting to use to join is soft-bouncing (your mailbox is so full that you cannot receive our "Special Notices") or hard-bouncing (the e-mail address does not exist, has been disabled or for whatever reason can NEVER accept e-mail)
• You are a Pro Domme, Money Domme, male top or female slave

Tyra Knotts, Warden

It is ironic that someone who tries to present herself as taking "the moral high ground", should be so insensitive as to name her "Correctional Facility" Ravensbrook, entirely too close to Ravensbruck, one of the most notorious Nazi Concentration camps... something which is bound to cause offense to many ( and do wonders for the image of the B&D Community...I think NOT!!). The truth is, instead of insulting & running down Professional Mistresses, if she has such belief in the status of the "Lifestyle Mistress", she should concentrate on her own group, and dedicate herself to make it a place where people want to be. It has taken a lot of dedication & work to build these sites & their memberships, it is both ironic & hypocritical that she should constantly come trolling for members and seek to get a "Free Ride" in groups run by a Professional Mistress.... Mistress Michelle

What is a Professional Mistress?

Some of you may be new to the internet and not be familiar with me, nor any of my articles. I have been into B&D and since 1963 and a professional Mistress since 1975. Being a professional does not mean you're a Mistress for financial gain. On the contrary, it should mean an experienced, well qualified, reputable Mistress, sympathetic of slaves needs. However that's not to say a slave should get the impression he has paid for a service, or services. Slaves should not think they are paying for a service, it is a honor to serve a Mistress.

On the other hand, Mistresses should not think they are so great that the money comes before the session. The session comes first and then the money will follow. Instead of wanting to learn more about B&D, acquiring new bondage devices or dominant attire, their prime purpose is getting the slaves money and pushing the slave out the door, almost as soon as he's arrived. Of course these Mistresses don't last that long, and the rest of us suffer in the meantime. Bondage and Discipline is an art, we are the very few! Remember we are not actresses but Mistresses!

In the next few months I will be writing a series of articles and stories. Most are true, some based on actual sessions and some are fantasies. I hope you will enjoy the articles and continue to be a member of this website. After all I am a real Mistress and have real stories to tell. Mistress Michelle

10 Qualities That Make A Good Mistress

by Lapp Topp

Here are some qualities I think are found in a good Mistress. As always, YMMV.

1. Control. Above all, a good Mistress is always in control of herself. She does not rant or rave, and never punishes when angry. On the rare times that temper overwhelms her, she walks away until she regains balance. After all, how can a Domme control her sub if she can't control herself?
2. Creative. A good Dominant puts time, energy and creativity in her scenes. She is not satisfied playing the same games over and over, and goes the extra length to come up with new and different ideas.
3. Human. The best Mistress knows she is human. She realizes she will make mistakes, and is quick to apologize when she does. She knows she won't be thought of as any less "Dommly" because of an apology. On the flip side, she realizes that others will make mistakes also, and even though she may punish for the mistake, she accepts an apology graciously and puts the event in the past.
4. Compassionate. A good Mistress is compassionate. She cares about her sub(s), friends and family. She takes time to listen and respond to the needs of others. She isn't selfish and doesn't have the illusion that the world revolves around her.
5. Technique. A good Domme works on her play technique. She knows how to use her toys and practices frequently. She reads the latest books and talks to others in the scene. An effective Mistress tests her toys on herself before she uses them on her sub.
6. Consistent. The best FemmeDom is consistent in her instructions and requests. She doesn't give her sub conflicting commands. She delivers equal punishment for equal offenses, and equal rewards when pleased. She is firm in her direction and does not waiver when faced with a difficult situation.
7. Thorough. An effective Dominant is thorough. She directs a scene from start to finish to better allow her sub to achieve headspace. She takes away all distractions and decisions...telling her sub what position she desires, what needs she wants fulfilled, and how this is best accomplished.
8. Respectful. A good Mistress respects herself and others. She strives to always project herself in the best possible light, and expects the same from her submissives. She is well-groomed, and takes pride in her looks. She takes good care of her toys and equipment.
9. Safe. A Domme worth playing with is safe. She is aware of the damage she can cause a submissive and does her best to prevent harm. She knows first-aid and attends classes periodically to keep herself updated.
10. Communication. A good Domme is an effective communicator. She says what she means, and means what she says. She is specific and chooses her words carefully. She doesn't rant, nag or whine because she knows this shows a lack of control. She states instructions in a clear, easy-to-understand manner.

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