Leather Essay

By Joel Park

What would one consider when thinking about a leather family and community?

What makes a family and what makes a community? Which one would you place the most value in? Where does one fit in with the larger picture of it all?

What role do you play in the leather scene, a Daddy, Sir, Master, slave, boy, puppy, dog pig, wolf, or bear. Are you a top bottom versatile? Or do you not go by either or any of those?

What is your over all purpose and intention? Do you know what you are doing when you call yourself a certain title? How much experience have you had in this role and how successful were or are you in it? Even better... how do you measure success in what you do? Is it by how many boys you have had in a certain amount of time, How much control you can inflict over an individual, how afraid you can make one be when in a session? Is it the almighty gift of how well endowed you are and how long you can keep going?

And the boy what makes you a boy? The fact that you want to suck a cock all the time or get used or even abused (and for the life of me I can’t understand why anyone would enjoy being abused), or the fact that you are a total bottom. Simply because one wears leather does NOT make you a leather man. You may look hot and great in it but what do you know about the life style?

What does it mean if you wear an armband on right or left or both? Do you know what protocol is and how to use it? As a bootblack I have seen so many men go by with the worse condition of leather wear and not give a damn about it. There is no pride of leather at all. I have a great deal of respect for leather and the care of it. I enjoy a man that knows how to wear it and use it well.

I can tell a leather man in street clothes. He can even be naked and I’ll know it.

A leather man knows another leather man (I should correct myself here, when I say leather man I mean that in a general sense not gender wise. To be politically correct I should say Leather Folk)

In the world at large we comprise a large part of the population being gay.

Gays, lesbians, Bi Sexual (in my own opinion bi sexual is not gay.) Gay is gay, bi sexual is not a gay person when a person is bi he /she has no preference and will swing both ways. There tends to be a sense of non commitment with them. There are those who for sake of family and marriage/children stay married and claim to be bi for that reason, and that is understandable.

Transgender are a unique and valued member as well. Drag folk have contributed to our community for years.

I have come from a small gay community in OK where leather was a part time event on certain days of month and year. We had a small club of brothers but close and committed to a positive image for our area. I moved to a larger population leather wise and gay as well. Yet I found that the smaller community was indeed a community. Where I live now there are more leather and gays but there seems to be no sense of real continuity and community. There are more competition, and rivalry. The bars do not work together for the common good.

In my area becoming a family is virtually improbable. Unless you have been here for ions, and had many connections you had no family. You can be part of a club and be out of place and ostracized. I was a bootblack in a bar that I had felt to be my "home bar" and was told to leave.

I know others have had same experience with that.

Leather used to have a meaning to many people and a valued lifestyle. Today that life style is diminishing greatly across the USA. Bars are closing down. People have no sense of pride in it.

They come into a leather bar wearing colon an armband, sneaker and undershirt or bare chest (PLEASE get a clue people). That is a direct insult to those of us that are true to the lifestyle and the bars we patronize.

I am a bootblack I cherish leather especially boots. We are many and growing in the country. Boot Blacking is not just a hobby or past time or even a way to meet and hook up with people.

It’s an art, a science and a treasure expression of personage. I for one, look upon boot blacking as a respected service. I perform to the best of my ability and do a profession job when I do it.

I take pride in my work.

I am part of a large family of bootblacks many of whom I have met, some I will and others I may not be able to but we all know that we "belong." Bootblacks do belong to the larger community of leather and without us there would be no true boot worshipers. We show and are equal to all leather men in the community and in competition. We hold our heads high and are proud of what we do. There is no one too small and unimportant in our family. We grow and learn from each other.

To conclude, I am a human being first and foremost, man secondly, gay, leather man/boy and bootblack lastly, all this comprises who and what I am. It is not my whole life or livelihood.

We owe it to each other to value, affirm and acknowledge who and what we are and do on a more regular basis. Being gay is not an easy life style. We get bashed and put down by non-accepting families, friends, churches. We even get bashed and rejected by our own "family! There is an old saying that has stayed true among the ages, "A house divide will not stand" well I say a community in conflict and strife will destroy itself. We have to learn to put aside our differences, swallow our pride and arrogance, and work together. All or most major cities have a gay pride weekend. We see many of our brothers and sister walking down streets. Big huge smiles and having fun. Putting on a show for the straight people to see we are here and ( I have this part) queer. I would rather dump the parade and show the world on a daily basis that we can live in this society and get along well and not create a scene. We can work with each other and create a positive image to those that scrutinize us. We can show the world that we are no different no better no worse than anyone else around. We have issues and problems, feelings and needs.

We just have different preferences for mates.

It’s my hope that I will be a part of a movement to create a more compatible community by helping others to see that without a solid family unit there will be no community.