This was received from Florida BDSM, and after reading
this written by Sir Dreamknight (Master Paul), I thought
this would be appropriate for the website. This was written
by Sir Magic. To contact him, his email address is
Webpage@darkangel.com
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Basic Protocols
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Do NOT touch another sub/slave without approval of their Dom.
This goes for casual touching (greeting hugs and handshakes) as
well. You must ask the Dom's permission before engaging in any
type of physical contact. Additionally, is also improper to
personally address One's property without permission. In some
circles it may be deemed insulting to the Owner to address
property without first asking the Dominant or Owner, "does
she/he speak or may I speak to him / her?" is highly
recommended. In a formal BDSM setting [event] some sub/slaves
only speak when spoken too. This is determined by their Dominant
and the event in question.
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When knowingly dealing with a collared sub/slave, all requests
for socialization, meetings, dates, munches, play, etc. must go
through the Dom first. You do not send an invitation directly
to a collared sub/slave. The invitation must go to their
Dominant/Owner first, asking permission to invite them to
said function. The Dominant then has the right to impose
whatever limits they see fit.
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NEVER step between Owner and property attached by lead or
leash. Never grab the leash of another's property without
permission. Please be mindful not to step on leads or leashes
or the handles. Correspondingly one should be cautious about
unattended or loose leads and leashes (not everyone is always
on the ball.) Under certain circumstances it is an open invitation
to have way with said attached property.
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When others are scening stay a respectful distance from their
scene. Even if you know them do not just walk up and speak to
those in a scene, unless you were previously invited to do so.
Those involved within a scene are in their own world and should
only be disturbed for reasons determined by One of authority
(usually regarding health, safety, welfare or personal emergency).
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You NEVER touch other people's toys or property without
permission, it is rude and can be a health hazard. If you
see a toy you like and would like to examine it, ask permission
BEFORE you touch it and NOT while they are in a scene.
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In a formal settings all Doms are called Sir/Madame/Mam. Only
the Dominant or owner of a sub/slave should be called Master
or Mistress by their sub/slave. Please note: in such cases Sir
or Madame is a general acknowledgement of station and not granting
them "title". Calling one Sir or a Domme "Lady"
is not to be confused with a formally titling them Sir / Lady (
insert name here
).
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When the Master/Mistress is engaged in conversation and it is
necessary to interrupt, the sub/slave should first wait to be
acknowledged before speaking. Once acknowledged, the sub/slave
should relay the information in a concise manner. In the event
of an emergency or critical need to know information, the sub/slave
should interrupt by saying "Excuse me Master/Mistress, Sir,
and Madame" and wait for further direction from the
Master/Mistress. In a formal setting, a Master/Mistress should
not be interrupted unless the information is critical.
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If a Dom acts inappropriately towards a sub/slave, it is not
the place (in most cases) of the sub/slave to correct the Dom's
actions. Instead, the Master/Mistress or DM is to be informed
of the incident and it is their responsibility quickly deal and
correct the situation. When a Dom is a guest in the home of
another Master/Mistress and their sub/slave, (the senior slave,
alpha slave) has authority over the visiting Dom as directed by
the Master/Mistress of the house. Although the sub/slave may
request that something is done or not done, this request is
phrased as such out of respect. The alpha slave has the last
word in the house in the event that the Master/Mistress is not
on premise or unless otherwise indicated by the Master/Mistress
of the house.
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Depending on circumstances and the event in question senior
a sub/slave also known as alpha sub can have over technical
authority Dominants and other slaves. This being the case the
alpha sub will be accorded the respect befitting their position
of said situation. For example: Munch's conventions or other
events. A new or young (not chronological age) should not self
select the title of Sir, Master/Mistress or Lord until such
time their basic skills are easily recognized by the established
peers in the community.
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These are what generally are considered very basic protocols.
Please keep in mind every scene is different. What I have
listed here are the more common threads of what makes up the
fabric of the National scene for traditionalists; in some
places aka Old and New Guard. Many of you my not function
at such formal levels, which is fine. But, like table manners
if you are to interact in the public scene at the very least
you should know them. Whether you choose to obey them is
another matter all together.
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