B.E.S.T. slave Training

“Choice Decision”

"Choice decision" Definition as used in B.E.S.T. slave training : A slave at some point in training, makes a decision to allow her Master to own her choices. In other words, she makes a "choice decision."

Behavior is based upon choices. What choices a person makes in life determines what actions they take. Owning a slaves choices is owning her behavior and actions. The feeling of helplessness to control and change her own behavior is important in slave training. Owning a slave's choices instills a feeling of helplessness to control her own behavior.

This is not always an easy decision for a slave to make and is directly related to the trust she feels in her Master. A Master may not make every choice for a slave but any he does make must be obeyed. She may have an influence on his final decision by offering advice, but she is bound by his final decision. In other words, in any area of her life that he wishes, he can make the choice as to how she behaves and she is obligated by her slavery to obeys.

When a slave makes a "Choice Decision" it mean her Master owns, controls, and can change or modify her behavior. Slavery does not exist without her granting her choices to her Master.

In early training, the goal of the “choice decision” theory is to change the slave's behavior, evaluate decision making steps to include her Master's choices in her actions, improve obedience and the relationship between Master and slave. This in turn allows her to effectively satisfy the desire to serve, obey and please him. A slave's “Choice decision” allows her Master to focus on her current conscious behavioral actions and change them if necessary to please him.

When changing behavior, insight is not enough. A Master makes an evaluation of current behavior, a plan of action to change undesired behavior is determined and the slave makes a commitment follow the plan of action.

The major part of "choice decision" involves a slave coming to terms with and learns to accept that she is a slave. Part of this acceptance of slavery is that her choices in life now belong to her Master. Her "freedom of choice" becomes the property of her Master. Her choice options are limited to making a choice to obey her Master. Failure to choose obedience will result in a logical consequence that will follow such as punishment and/or additional discipline training.

In the beginning, a slave will have to consciously grant her master her choices each time she is given an order or her choices are restricted. As time passes, the granting of choices to her Master becomes easier for her and will become second nature. At this point, granting a master her choice becomes part of her being and natural.

Simply making a decision to granting her Master all her choices does not mean that training is not necessary. The major goal of slave training is to reeducate and reorient the slave to better serve, obey and please her Master. Discipline training and punishment may be necessary to develop the slave. Punishment may be imposed for displeasing her Master as is praise used when she pleases him. Controlling a slaves body is comprised of controlling her space, time, physical actions, privacy and relationships with others and discipline training can be developed for each area.

Element of a “Choice decision” when compared to common statements about choices:

• Behavior is chosen as a way to deal with frustration and improving life. A slave's behavior is based upon compliance to her Master's choices. Improving her slavery is always geared to obedience and obedience is compliance to her Master's decisions.
• All behavior is a matter of choice. A slave makes a decision to grant her Master the ability to interject his choices whenever he wishes. Her behavior, for the most part, is a result of the choices her Master makes.
• People choose to behave in a way that improves a relationship. This is only accomplished by obeying, serving and pleasing her master. That means he makes the decisions as to how she behaves.
• Our brain is a monitoring system and we choose from a wide range of actions, one particular action when confronted with a particular event. This general statement is not always true for a slave. The major difference is that a slave may be required to not make a choice herself, but follow the decision of her Master when confronted with a particular action or event. The decision is his, her duty is to follow.
• Behavior is internally motivated and chosen. For a slave, the internal motivation is to obey, serve and please her Master, therefore a slaves behavior is not always chosen by her. It may be internally motivated but externally chosen.
• The slave makes choices to obey and give her freedoms to her Master. What she chooses determines her relationship with her Master. This is where she makes a decision to become a slave and this involves a "choice decision". Only be doing so will the relationship between Master and slave deepen.

"Choice decision” states that a slave will choose to change her behavior when:

1. her present behavior is not producing what her Master wants, and
2. when she believes that the choice of a different behavior will get her closer to the goals that have been set for and adopted by her.

As part of her “Choice decision” a slave must accept the loss of freedoms, power, and control and relinquish them to her Master. It is natural for a slave in BDSM slave training to resist or have a reactance to a loss of freedom. After all, she is giving up her right to make a choice. This means accepting that she is yielding more of herself and trusting someone else enough to make choices for her. The level at which she is willing or able to give her freedoms to her Master is directly tied to the increased level of trust she has in her Master. She will come to realize that their is no sense in becoming upset with what she can’t control.

The Master need not listen very long to complaining, blaming or criticizing. These are the three most ineffective behaviors in our behavior repertoire. If a Master has the power to choose her actions, then he is responsible for what he choose. He is also responsible for the consequences of that choice. The Master had made the choice as to how he wishes his slave to behave and the slave's duty is to obey. He has taken responsibility for her behavior.

The giving of freedoms is consensual and usually accomplished in steps. In the first step, she must make a decision as to which is more important to her, freedom or slavery. If slavery is the answer, then she will accept the loss of freedom, then the fear will subside and she will find peace and calmness in the deepening of her slavery. The satisfaction of accomplishment she feels when she yields to her Master and finds her inner peace and destiny makes the choice a valid one and aids in her overall development.

When a slave makes a “Choice decision” she should focus on gaining awareness of current total behavior and have a wiliness to change it to please her Master. Acceptance and awareness helps develop a positive self-image.

Major questions a slave should ask as part of developing her skills to grant her choices to her Master are:

1. Does your present behavior have a reasonable chance of pleasing your Master and taking you in the direction you want to go?
2. What are you doing now to deepen your slavery?
3. Is what you are doing helping or hurting?
4. Is what you are doing against the rules
5. How committed are you to changing your life and becoming a slave and how is this behavior helping you achieve that?”
6. Who are you and what is your part in this relationship?
7. Who do you serve?
8. What freedoms, power, and authority have you given to your Master and which ones are you holding onto?
9. What are you gaining by holding these freedoms, powers and authority?
10. What is the correct choice to make in order to deepen your slavery?

An effective technique to establish control of a slave's choices is for a Master to identifies specific ways for his slave to serve, obey and please him, therefore helping her fulfill the desire to obtain slavery. This identification should contain current behavior practices, a plan of positive changes that requires action on the slave's part and be simple to follow. This allows the slave to reflect upon choices she has given to her Master and define areas that need improvement.

The decision a slave makes to allow her Master to own her choices is key to her development.

“Choice decision” is an adaptation from Reality Therapy for slave training. Reality Therapy when applied to therapy is referred to as Choice Therapy. It is a cognitive examination of the reasons we behave as we do and a method of correcting behavior. The following is how “Choice decision” can be used to deal with resistance and particular behavioral problems in slave training.

(adapted from "Reality Therapy is Action” by William Glasser, MD copyright 2000, HarperCollins Publishers)