|
The Intelligent Man's Guide To Handball
A Preface From Fetish Alliance
I found this article quite a few years ago that my Master received
at a MAFIA party. It was a great article and had pretty good
information and is I felt it was worth reading, HOWEVER, not
all the views laid out in this article are shared by Fetish
Alliance and they certainly shouldn't be seen as gospel. Make
your own decision!
Also, I have searched for 'R.A. Fournier' and, as yet, not
found him. DO NOT send replies to his survey or requests for
his directory to the address given in the article. The addresses
given are no longer valid. I have left those sections in the
article because I think they have historical value.
The Intelligent Man's Guide to HANDBALL
(the sexual sport)
by R.A. Fournier
R.A. Fournier, MLS, is a professional medical writer, reporting
to the medical community on the phamacokinetics of new prescription
drugs.
Copyright 1983, R.A. Fournier. All rights reserved.
[Used on the Fetish Alliance web without permission, but
*not* for lack of trying!]
To Bill
Acknowledgements:
I wish to thank my very close friends in New York, Washington,
DC, and Philadelphia whose reading of the manuscript and comments,
suggestions and support have been invaluable. In addition, I wish
to thank the two medical doctors who evaluated the book (one
straight, one gay) and have so generously given their
professional advice.
A very special thanks to Al for his friendship, and
for providing a warm, quiet place in which to write.
Table of Contents
I. You Want to Put Your Hand Where?
II. The Depths of Desire
III. Anal Pleasure/Anal Pain
IV. Is Handball Dangerous?
V. Why Is the Ass Like A Musical Instrument?
VI. Why Do It At All?
VII. The Gruesome Details
VIII. Minimizing the Dangers
IX. Anatomy and Pleasure: It's the Stretch Not the Depth
X. A Note on the Penis
XI. The Pleasures of Topping
XII. The Pleasures of Being a Bottom
XIII. Some Thoughts on Being a Bottom
XIV. Fear and Trust
XV. Handball Anyone? Finding a Partner
XVI. Preparing for Handball
XVII. Going All the Way: A True Story
XVIII. The Survey
XIX. The Directory
I. You Want to Put Your Hand Where?
It has not been very long since the days when I simply did
not believe that someone could actually place their entire
hand into someone else's rectum; nor could I conceive of
anyone wanting to do that. The reality of it came home when
I witnessed the act at the Black Party of a popular Manhattan
disco. That night I not only witnessed someone fist fuck
another man, but he went in all the way to the shoulder!
Needless to say I was nonplussed. As I stood there, drink
in hand, watching this event occur on a stage set up above
the bar, the only thought that ran through my mind was
"that man is not going to walk out of here alive."
Not only did he survive the experience, but as fate had it,
I met him a couple of years later. He turned out to be one
of the sweetest, gentlest and kindest men I ever met.
Although depth is not the object of handball, there are
many men who enjoy depth, but there are few who can take
it to the shoulder. Tom has over 10 years experience as
a bottom and he has never experienced an injury. He
explained to me that he is very careful about whom he
plays with and he avoids heavy drugs.
Although the image of handball is strong, aggressive
and powerful, it is really a very gentle, caring and
intimate act. When I first heard about handballing, I
mentally relegated it to the realm of the kinky and
bizarre; an act performed by perverts and sadomasochists.
Today I either have to consider myself a pervert or
believe it to be an act that, although extreme, is
definitely within the realm of physical possibility
and the spectrum of acceptable sexual behavior. No
matter what view one may hold of handballing, and
whether or not one chooses to participate in this
activity, it is nothing to be afraid of. Handballing
is simply another way of exploring the feelings that
the body has to offer.
Some argue that handball is not natural. But is there
any form of sex that is 'natural'? The only type of
sex that I would call 'natural' is heterosexual coitus
for the purpose of procreation - and even straights
have abandoned that notion. Sex for pleasure is purely
the product of the human mind. Oddly enough even some
men who are continuously searching for bigger and
bigger dicks and think nothing of inserting large
dildos and other objects into their asses, find
the thought of handballing appalling. Many men fear
releasing control to another person. Yet, the level
of trust and intimacy that handball requires is central
to the intense physical and psychological pleasures
that it provides.
<Back to the Table of Contents>
II. The Depths of Desire
There are a number of reasons why I have wanted to write
this book. On one level it is a way of vindicating myself
and my behavior. As a writer, I have a great need to analyze
and understand myself and the world around me. It is not
enough for me to just 'feel'; I always have to set my
feelings to words. Is through words that I come to
understand. I do not see myself as a pervert or sadomasochist.
I am a sane, intelligent, educated and rational man with the
desire to explore anal pleasure to its limits. I have a
deep respect for my health, my body and my mind. I would
never participate in any activity that would purposely
hurt me or others. Sex for me has always been a positive
and pleasant enterprise to be carried out without shame.
Getting involved in handballing did, however, force me to
reevaluate myself and my desires. The insertion of a fist
into an ass carries with it powerful overtones of dominance
and submission and shades of S&M. In addition, the potential
physical dangers involved are very real. Before I could accept
handball as a legitimate sexual act I had to know everything
about it. Unfortunately information on this subject is
difficult to come by.
The little information that is available on handball
barely covers the subject except to alert you to its
dangers. There was no account I could find that detailed
exactly what is involved, that presented the necessary
precautions and preparations, or that outlined the anatomical
and physiological aspects. The only publications that I could
find that purports to be any sort of guide is "The Fist
Fucker's Manual." That book only served to frighten me
as the main purpose of the book is to present fictionalized
accounts of what may be the author's fantasies, but would be
dangerous if carried out in reality. A more recent book, The
Divine Androgyne, (Sanctuary Publications, San Diego, CA)
places handballing within the framework of Eastern Philosophy.
Although not an objective guidebook, it is beautifully written
and illustrated and well worth reading.
The Intelligent Man's Guide to Handball - the sexual sport
is a synthesis of information obtained through interviews
with medical doctors, interviews with other handballers,
information obtained from the medical literature, information
based upon anatomy and physiology as well as my own experiences.
This book is as much an account of my own journey as it is an
objective presentation of the facts; many times the only 'facts'
that were available were those that I deduced for myself. The
Guide is the book I wish I would have had when I first
started out.
For the reader who is considering getting involved with
handball, I hope that I have provided enough solid information
upon which a decision can be made. For those readers who are
merely curious about the subject, I hope that The Guide helps
to place handballing with the spectrum of acceptable sexual
behavior. Handball is just one more form of sexual expression,
it neither replaces nor discounts other forms.
Handball arouses a great deal of emotion. Although is seems
that every homosexual is curious about the practice, the
feelings it arouses are polar: men are either all for it
or totally repelled by it. This situation is a result of
the great amount of ignorance that exists about the subject.
Though the practice of handball is continually gaining in
popularity, there is a general avoidance of the topic -
both in the media and in conversation. When it is discussed,
it usually as some sort of bizarre perversion. The gay media
has particularly avoided the issue.
When the gay newspaper, The Advocate, ran a series of
articles on gay organizations in America ("A Survey
of Gay Organizations", 1976) it made no mention of
FFA (Fist Fuckers of America), TAIL (Total Ass Involvement
League), MAFIA (Mid America Fists in Action), or the
Catacombs. Navin, Helen. Medical and Surgical Risks in
Handballing: Implications of an inadequate socialization
process. Journal of Homosexuality, 6(3):69, 1981.
The few articles that have appeared in the gay media have
been decidedly negative. This is irresponsible. Carried
out in ignorance, handballing can be dangerous. I find
it contradictory that gay magazines will publish fiction
in which fist fucking occurs and yet not publish articles
on the hows and whys of it.
Handballing is treated as a taboo subject and because of
this there is a great amount of fear and ignorance. From
a political perspective there are some who believe that
the practice will hinder the assimilation of gays into
mainstream society, i.e. news of it will somehow slow
down our ability to gain equal rights. If the price of
equality is our sexuality, do we really want that
'equality'? Anal sex in general and handball in particular
are not the sole properties of homosexuals. Everybody has
an asshole, gay or straight. Behind the drawn shades of
Middle America's tract houses, millions of heterosexual
couples play anal sex games and we suspect this practice
of fist fornication to become more popular among
heterosexual couples.
Sohn, Norman et al. Social Injuries of the Rectum.
The American Journal of Surgery.. 134:612, 1977.
Sex is essentially an activity of the mind for which the
body is only the agent. There are myriad sexual variations
many of which are potentially more dangerous than handball
- bondage, whipping, suffocation, piercing, etc. Handball,
however, appears to arouse the greatest amount of fear. A
real evaluation of the practice of handball should be based
on information and not fear.
<Back to the Table of Contents>
III. Anal Pleasure/Anal Pain
It must be admitted that not everyone, not even all homosexual
men, accept any form of anal stimulation as a valid source of
sexual pleasure. As free thinking men we have the right to
choose what does and does not give us pleasure. The very
sensations that are interpreted as pleasurable by one group
of men are seen as painful by another. Anal sensations are not
by nature either pleasurable or painful. The negative or
positive attitude that one develops about anal sensations
appears to be a learned response possibly associated with
one's early toilet training and family attitudes toward
defecation.
This process of self-alienation is especially pronounced
in the anal area which often is the bodily symbol of all
that is unclean and disgusting. It is understandably
confusing that part of the body which is supposed to
be so unsavory is also extremely sensitive and
potentially among the most enjoyable. Especially
for a child, the discovery that the anus is considered
bad and repulsive must be confusing, since the idea
is in direct contradiction to his or her pleasurable
experience. Morin, Jack. Anal Pleasure and Health,
Down There Press, Burlingame, CA, 1981. pp 1-2.
Fecal waste material is not a sexual stimulant and it
may be difficult for some too disassociate the anus from
its excretory function and view it as a sex organ. Anal
sensations appear to be neutral ones open to being
subjectively interpreted as either pleasurable or not
by the individual. An anal retentive person is one who
is uptight, cannot relax, must continually carry the
burdens of life upon his shoulders, and cannot enjoy
pleasure. A person who can enjoy anal sensations is one
who likes himself enough to let go of problems and worries
and allow himself pleasure.
<Back to the Table of Contents>
IV. Is Handball Dangerous?
The question "Is Handball Dangerous?" can be easily
answered: yes it is. So is smoking cigarettes, driving a car,
crossing the street, and taking a bath. The question should
really be "is handball so dangerous that it should be
avoided?" The answer to that question is not as simple
and requires one to analyze the available information, weigh
the possible risks against the pleasures, and decide for
oneself. The little that is written on the subject is
contradictory.
... all of the many doctors I spoke to in preparation for
this book felt that fist fucking is about the most dangerous
current sex practice... It can kill you. You may feel no pain,
but if you're being fist fucked your partner quite literally
has your life in his hand(s). Fenwick, R.D. The Advocate
Guide to Gay Health, E.P. Dutton, New York, 1978, pp 64, 66.
... when it is approached slowly, gently and with minimal or
no drug use, the risk of physical damage is probably low. In
fact by promoting very deep relaxation it may, in some cases,
actually be beneficial. Morin p 109.
Larry Kramer, writing a fictional account of homosexual
encounters in Faggots (1978) says, "Fist-fucking is
quite popular with some of the boys. I heard they had
twenty deaths last year from holes in the stomach [sic]
at St. Vincent's in the Village alone." (p. 356)
Surgical personnel in the Emergency Department of St.
Vincent's in New York deny this categorically. Emergency
incident involving bowel trauma probably do number 20
during a year, but no deaths have occurred in the
Emergency Department, nor subsequently in cases
requiring surgical intervention. Navin, p 71.
Stories of deaths resulting from fist-fucking are rampant;
especially among non-fist-fuckers. One would have to be a
true idiot to pursue something the inevitable result of which
would be one's demise. I assure you that handballers are not
suicidal. I found no substantiation of any death resulting
from fist-fucking. Injury can occur and it the injury is
serious and left uncared for, death can result. Death would
then be a function of stupidity and not fist-fucking. Contrary
to what Mr. Fenwick says in The Advocate Guide to Gay Health,
you would feel this type of injury. Peritonitis resulting
from perforating the colon produces severe cramps.
I have attended numerous handball parties and have met
at least a thousand men who are handballers. Not once have
I witnessed an injury of any sort and at the end of each
party everyone who attended walked out both happy and very
much alive. This to me is the best evidence of the relative
safety of handballing. V. Take Two Suppositories and Call
Me In the Morning.
In the face of contradictory reports, rampant gossip, lack
of valid information, and my own ignorance, I turned to my
doctor for advice. My doctor is young (under 40), straight,
and married. I must admit that is was with some trepidation
that I broached the subject with him, and I expected a
violent negative reaction. Instead he told me that the
anus and colon are very strong muscle groups, quite
capable of accepting a fist. As long as it is carried
out with gentleness and care, without force, the anus
is quite capable of safely accepting large objects.
Although Doctors as a group are not known for their
liberal attitudes and often share the same prejudices
and irrational fears of the culture, I recommend that
you discuss handball with your physician. In this way
he would be able to advise you and give you his feelings
on the subject. In addition, he would be aware of what
you are up to and be ready to treat you properly should
you ever require medical attention. Of course your Doctor
may have never heard of handball! Here is a frightening
tale from The Advocate Guide to Gay Health:
... Once in the emergency room, the young man blurted out
that he'd been messing around" the night before, that
his sexual partner had "stuck his arm up me, all the
way to the elbow." The physician on duty was immediately
skeptical. "What kind of drugs were you taking?"
"Just some grass and a little amyl." "No,
you've dropped acid, " replied the physician.
"You know and I know that it isn't possible to
stick your arm up someone's rear end. Your hallucinating."
The young man was heavily sedated with Thorazine... That night
the pain became so intense that he had to return to the
hospital, where an emergency "appendectomy"
revealed extensive peritonitis. The young man died. Fenwick,
p. 67.
I really don't know how true this story is as the author does
not provide any reference source or other substantiation, but
one wonders what kind of training this doctor received.
The folds of anal tissue give the anal canal a striking
capacity for expansion, depending on the level of muscular
tension. For example, during rectal surgery, under anesthesia,
a person's anal muscles can be easily dilated so the surgeon's
entire hand can pass through the anal canal. This same
expansiveness is called upon in "fisting" or
"fist fucking" which is a popular sexual activity
among a few people. These extremes are not experienced by
most people, but they illustrate the fact that anal tissue
can easily and safely expand for fingers, penises, etc.
Morin, p 69.
The amazing ability of the anus to expand is something that
one learns from a study of the basic anatomical structure of
the area. I find it quite surprising that any physician would
be unaware of this. Be that as it may, it is very important that
anyone who experiments with handball make his physician aware
of it.
Homosexual men should recognize that doctors and nurses,
unless themselves gay, are unlikely to be aware of the
practice of handballing. Because so few articles on handballing
have been published in medical journals, and none in nursing
journals only very alert physicians will be well informed
about the subject... If adequate medical treatment is to
be obtained, the homosexual client must provide the doctor
or nurse with a full patient history regardless of the
reaction by the person taking the medical history. Navin,
p 75.
<Back to the Table of Contents>
V. Why Is the Ass Like A Musical Instrument?
An understanding of the anatomical structure and physiological
purpose of the anus and rectum reveals both the source of the
anatomical possibility of handballing and the source of the
physical pleasure derived from it.
The rectum is a tube-like structure made of loose folds
of soft, smooth tissue. Its total length is about eight
or nine inches. Normally the rectum is more open and
spacious than the anus. Like the anus, it has a striking
capacity to expand. Morin, p 103.
The lower intestinal system forms essentially one continuous
tube from the large colon to the sigmoid colon, thence to the
rectum and anus. It is characterized by folds, called fossa,
and curves. These folds give the system the ability to expand
in much the same way as an accordion. The physiologic purpose
of the lower intestinal system is as a waste compactor and
eliminator. It is anatomically structured to deal with the
movement of bulky material. The fossa allow the system to
expand to accommodate the bulky material that it must deal
with, and the smooth muscle that composes the walls of the
system moves the material along it. A lining of mucosal tissue
lubricates the procedure. By its nature then, the anal canal
(the anus or anal opening) and the rectum are capable of
learning to adapt to various sizes and to develop the
flexibility and strength to deal with new demands.
The parts of the body that are of direct concern to
handballing are the anal canal and the rectum.
The anal canal and rectum are usually called upon to
release material. Handballing or the insertion of any
object into the anal canal requires that the system
operate in reverse.
The anal canal consists of both the external and internal
sphincter and forms the anus itself. The anal canal is a
very strong muscle group designed to expand and stretch to
accommodate variously sized excretions. The anal canal is
controlled by both the sympathetic and parasympathetic
nervous system, i.e., it functions by itself without
the need for thought, but it can be taught to respond
to one's will. After all, one does not defecate wherever
one finds oneself. We have learned to retain our need
for a bowel movement until we reach a proper locale -
normally a toilet. Practitioners of anal sex have learned
to control the anal canal to a great degree and to willfully
relax the anus to accommodate whatever object is being
placed in it. Handball requires great control over the
anus. In time and with patience the anus can learn to
allow a fist through. Depending upon the amount of anal
experience a person may already have, the anal canal
will either be ready or not to accept a fist. This
also depends upon the size of the fist in question;
a small fist will be easier to accept than a large
one. Just as one does not expect to develop a 48-inch
chest overnight, neither should one expect to be able
to accept a fist on the very first or even second try.
Gentle unforced practice over time will develop the anal
canal. Force can only lead to pain and injury.
How can you tell if the anus is ready to take a fist? It
is quite simple: if there is pain, it is not ready. Unless
you like pain, be patient with yourself and allow your
anus to tell you when it is ready. This may require months
or even a year or more, but you have your whole life. Do
not let anyone force you to go beyond what you feel is
your capacity at the moment.
The rectum itself is already a cavity: it is a depot or
way-station for fecal material waiting to be eliminated
through the anus. The rectum, therefore, usually does not
pose as much a problem as the anus in accommodating a fist.
There are some things about the rectum that you should be
aware of, however.
The rectum is a muscle and, unless you've done a lot of
experimenting with large dildos, it is probably not
accustomed to accommodating an object the size of a fist.
Like the anal canal, the rectum also requires patient
training. By the time the anus is ready to allow a fist
through, the rectum is usually ready to accommodate it.
A fist or any object that is too large for the rectum
can cause a mucosal laceration. This is not serious,
but may require medical attention and a prescription
for antibiotics.
Once you have decided that you are ready and you allow
your anus to slide down a well-lubricated hand to come
to rest upon and grip your partner's wrist, the feeling
will be very intense. It is a difficult feeling to describe
and, although it should not be painful, the sensation may
be so new and intense that you may not know if it is pleasure
or pain. Over time, as you learn these new feelings, the
intensity of entry diminishes. The new demands that you
are placing upon your anus and rectum require it to stretch
beyond what it normally expects.
Your partner inserts his hand into the anus by folding the
fingers and following the natural curvature of your rectum.
The thumb is kept in the palm and as the activity progresses
the fingers fold over the thumb to form a fist. The intensity
of the sensation comes from the act of stretching the rectal
walls with the fingers. Once the fist is formed, the rectum
is called upon to accommodate the bulkiness of the fist itself,
and there is a great sensation of release as the anus is allowed
to constrict around the wrist.
Although much of the pleasure of handball comes from the feeling
of bulkiness, you may or may not be able to take it in the beginning
and may want your partner to remove his hand almost immediately.
This is very common and do not hesitate to let your partner know
what you want. Removal of the hand can be as intense as insertion,
however, and even though you may feel you want the hand out as
soon as possible do not allow your partner to quickly pull it
out and do not 'push' it out. By this time you have learned what
it takes on your part to allow the hand to get into your rectum
and you should follow the same, careful procedure in reverse.
You can control the removal (and the insertion) by taking deep
and slow breaths. From my own experience, I would say that
learning to breathe deeply and slowly is the key to controlling
the anus.
On the other hand, you may not want the immediate removal of
the hand. When you reach this you are ready to enjoy the feeling
of a fist in your rectum. Have your partner keep his hand
completely still and allow yourself to feel the sensations
of your rectum as it accommodates the fist.
Given the anatomic and physiologic nature of the anus and
rectum - muscle groups designed to deal with the movement
of matter of changing bulk - it should come as no surprise
that through exercise the system can learn to accept something
as large as a hand. As noted above, surgeons often place
their entire hands into anesthetized patients during rectal
operations. It is not an utterly foreign procedure, but doing
it for sexual pleasure is an entirely different matter.
<Back to the Table of Contents>
VI. Why Do It At All?
It appears that handballing requires a lot of time and
patience, and as you read on you will realize that there
are a number of important precautions and preparations
that should be followed to pursue it safely; as a top
or as a bottom. I personally do not believe that anyone
should just be a top, and I would never trust anyone
to play with me who has not experienced it for himself.
To be a successful top one must know what it feels like
to be a bottom.
Even after taking the time and effort to train your body
for handball, you may decide that it isn't for you and
give it up. So why do it at all? The answer, of course,
is that the pleasures to be derived from handball are
incredible. Handball is unlike anything else, even
penile/anal sex. Handballing offers physical and
psychological pleasures that go beyond what most
people normally experience.
Handballing is not for everyone, and before going
on to describe the physiologic basis for the pleasures
involved in handball, I will turn to a sobering account
of the very real potential dangers involved in the act.
<Back to the Table of Contents>
VII. The Gruesome Details
A review of the medical literature reveals very little about
handballing. The available articles on the subject do, however,
indicate the types of injuries that may result from handballing.
The most common injuries are:
- mucosal laceration, i.e., a cut in the mucosal lining of
the rectum or colon. This is usually cared for with antibiotics.
Sometimes a laceration will require stitching.
- muscle tear, i.e., overstretching the anal canal (anus).
This can result from forcing a hand that is too large into an
anus that is not properly relaxed. This will often cure itself
by simply leaving it alone for a while.
- bowel perforation, i.e., breaking through the muscle wall of
the rectum or colon. This is the most serious type of injury
because it leads to contamination of the peritoneum or body
cavity (peritonitis) and requires an emergency operation.
Uncared for, peritonitis can be fatal.
"Social Injuries of the Rectum" (Sohn et al.
The American Journal of Surgery, 134:611-612, 1977) is
both a report on 11 cases of injury resulting from handball
and a survey of 60 homosexual men who practice handballing.
Of the 11 cases reported, 6 were mucosal lacerations that
occurred in the rectum; 2 of the men required sutures. Four
of the 11 cases involved perforations at or near the sigmoid
curve (the upper end of the rectum that connects with the
ascending colon). These 4 men required emergency operations
and suffered from peritonitis. Surgery was performed to close
the perforation and the peritonitis was treated with antibiotics.
One of the four men required a temporary colostomy. The last case
was of a man who suffered incontinence, and the article does not
report on the treatment involved in this case. Incontinence, i.e.,
the inability to control bowel movements, appears to be extremely
rare. In fact it appears that handballers develop increased
control over their bowels rather than less. The 11 cases were
seen over a period of four years at the Lenox Hill Hospital
in New York City. Although the article is sobering, it fails
to place the 11 cases in statistical perspective. Is 11 cases
over 4 years a great or minor amount? What percentage of the
active population does 11 cases represent? Under what conditions
did the injuries occur?
It appears that serious injury can only occur if force is
combined with heavy drug use. In fact, the use of drugs is
probably the most dangerous aspect of handballing and not
the act itself. Drugs blot out sensation and common sense.
Combining heavy drugs with handball is dangerous. The chance
of serious injury also increases with depth. In going for
depth the hand must be open, thereby exposing the fingertips
and nails to the muscle wall. Injuries deep into the rectum
and colon are more difficult to treat simply because they
are less accessible. If the hand is kept closed into a
fist and maintained in the rectum, it is unlikely that
injury will occur.
The report on the survey helps to clarify the subject a
little more. The authors distributed 200 questionnaires
and 60 men responded. The article does not note how the
questionnaires were distributed nor does it indicate
how the men were chosen.
The results of the survey were:
|
Average age
|
38.4 years
|
|
Age Range
|
20 - 52 years
|
|
% Drug Use
|
"most" - the article fails to give a %
and defines 'drug' as amyl nitrite, marijuana,
LSD, mescaline and alcohol.
|
|
% Tops
|
17%
|
|
% Bottoms
|
12%
|
|
Both Top and Bottom
|
71%
|
|
# of injuries
|
3 (5%) - 'injury' was defined as perforation of
the rectum or colon requiring a laparotomy (incision)
to control.
|
The authors conclude that the number of injuries involved
is significant and that the medical profession should expect
to see an increase in such injuries. If this is true then
why is it that I could not locate more reports in the medical
literature? Although the article does not allow for any
substantial conclusions, it does bring attention to the fact
that injuries can and do occur.
A more recent article entitled "Brachioproctic
Eroticism" (Lowery, TP and Williams, GR. British
Journal of Sexual Medicine, January, 1981:32-33) reports
on a survey conducted in San Francisco. The authors
distributed a questionnaire at leather bars, bookstores,
homosexual conventions (sic), 'specialty' nightclubs,
and doctors' consulting rooms. The authors also "...
visited a social club which specializes in participation
in this activity, and did detailed interviews of several
participants." The results of the survey were:
|
# Respondents
|
102
|
|
Mean Age
|
34.1 years
|
|
Age Range
|
22 - 54 years
|
|
Drug Use
|
Always - 37%
Almost Always - 42%
Sometimes - 20%
|
|
Types of Drugs
|
(In order of preference) marijuana, amyl nitrite,
methylene dioxyamphetamine (speed), alcohol, and
cocaine. Other drugs included LSD, methaqualine
(Quaaludes) and isobutyl nitrite (poppers)
|
|
Depth of Penetration
|
Average - 26.6cm (ca. 10 Inches)
Range - 7 - 53 cm (ca. 3 - 21 Inches)
Depth of penetration was self reported on a sketch
of an arm. 24% reported penetration by 2 hands
simultaneously and 17% reported penetration by a foot.
|
|
Douching
|
88% (i.e., taken an enema)
|
|
Description of the Experience
|
Positive - 85% reported the experience in favorable
to ecstatic terms
Mixed - 8%
Negative - 8%
|
|
# Injuries
|
3 (3%) ". . .3 cases of peritonitis from perforation
by a careless drug intoxicated partner. These subjects
required surgery and prolonged hospitalization."
|
With regards to the number of injuries reported the authors conclude that
"...it is remarkable what extraordinary physical
activities can be conducted with relatively infrequent
harm, i.e., one perforation per 2,000 insertions."
This report has more substance than the first and gives enough
detail so that the injuries involved in handball can be placed
in some informed perspective.
It is undeniably apparent that injury can occur from handball.
No one really knows how many men practice handballing or how
many get injured doing it. Injury is not fatal, however, it
can be serious and expensive. Injury appears to occur under
conditions that can be controlled: drug abuse and irresponsible
behavior.
In addition to the above, Helen Navin (previously cited) reports
the possibility of coronary problems. although she does not cite
any case, she states that "there can be no serious doubt,
however, that vigorous massage, as in handballing, can produce
transient arrhythmias or even fatal effects on the heart."
(p 74)
In conclusion if one is going to handball, one must be willing
to accept the risks. Do the pleasures of handball outweigh the
risks involved?
<Back to the Table of Contents>
XIII. Minimizing the Dangers
Handball is an intense physical experience that must be
approached with respect; respect for the act itself and
respect for one's body and health. Is there an 'intelligent'
way of approaching hand- balling? The dangers can be minimized
by applying common sense.
It may be helpful to always keep a certain amount of cautious
fear in the back of your mind to help maintain control over
the act and force you to approach it with care. To lessen the
possibility of injury, the following suggestions may be helpful:
-
Make sure the fingernails of the top are closely cropped
and smoothly manicured. The fingernails are the only part
of the hand that can seriously threaten to cause a perforation.
It is always acceptable for the bottom to check his partner's
nails.
-
Use copious amounts of lubrication. Never attempt handballing
without lots of grease. It is not uncommon to use a pound
or more of lubrication in one session. The type of lubricant
is also important. Vegetable based products such as Crisco,
Lube, Elbow Grease etc. are perfect. Stay away from KY
jelly and other water based preparations. Never use
petroleum based lubricants either as they may damage
the mucosal lining. Motor oil may be butch, but is
definitely not recommended. Other things to avoid
are hand lotions, facial creams, or preparations that
contain perfumes or other additives.
-
Avoid misusing drugs. In this sport, getting there is
more than half the fun. The excitement that you get when
first learning the sport will never be the same again.
If you are going to do it at all, enjoy the trip. Do
not use drugs to dull the very sensations that you
are seeking. Let your body be your guide.
-
Do not penetrate deeper than the rectum itself and
keep the hand closed into a fist. As the hand enters
the rectum, it almost naturally folds as it follows
the curve of the rectum. Although there is great
pleasure involved in being massaged by the fingers,
it is safest to stay with the closed fist until
you gather experience. It is always acceptable to
advise your partner as to what you want before
you begin to play.
-
Never apply force. If the anus is ready and relaxed
enough to accept a fist, it will do so. Force can
lead to injury. If there is pain (or even if you
think there is pain) it is time to stop. You have
all the time in the world to learn.
<Back to the Table of Contents>
IX. Anatomy and Pleasure: It's the Stretch Not the Depth
There is no available material, no Master's and Johnson's or
Kinsey Report detailing what happens during handball or why
its so intensely pleasurable. Because of this, this account
of the anatomical demands and physiologic responses involved
in handball is a subjective one based upon my own experiences.
Interviews with other men suggest that my description of the
experience is similar to others. Although there are many
similarities, it must be noted that the experience is very
different for each individual. In addition, it is never the
same for each individual. There are many variables that influence
the experience. These include:
-
the level of experience and competency of the top;
-
the level of trust between the partners;
-
the physical state of the bottom. For example, douching
may sometimes make the anus very sensitive;
-
the environment, e.g., in a group situation or one-on-one
in someone's home.
The first physical demand that is made upon the anus is to stretch.
Hands come in various sizes. The circumference of a hand at the
widest part ranges from 10 to 15 inches, and the length of the
hand and fingers also varies, which in turn varies the bulk of
the hand.
The smaller the hand, the easier it is to insert. Men with
small hands are very popular on the handball circuit.
The anus is highly sensitive with many nerve endings. As
the top slowly massages the anus and rectum by first massaging
the outer folds and then by inserting one finger at a time into
the rectum, the bottom experiences increasing degrees of stretch.
The feeling of stretch reaches its peak as the hand reaches the
knuckles. If the bottom is physically and mentally ready to
allow the hand to completely enter, the next sensation is of
relief. The anus slides down the hand to come to rest around
the much smaller wrist. Of course, wrists also come in various
sizes. As the hand enters the rectum, there is the added
sensation of fingers completing there folding into the palm,
forming the fist. The bottom usually moans very loudly at
this step. Handballing is generally a very loud activity. It
involves playing with your guts and its ridiculous to try to
be 'civilized' at a moment like that!
The physical sensation within the rectum is very different
since the rectum is mainly composed of smooth muscle and has
fewer nerve endings. The main sensation is one of great bulk;
as if you have to make a great big bowel movement. A tension
appears to be produced between the body's desire to eliminate
the hand and the maintenance of the hand inside the rectum.
The body interprets the hand as material to be eliminated,
the smooth muscles respond with relative degrees of spasm,
and the tension appears to cause dilation of the muscle walls.
All of these reactions constitute the physiologic basis for
the pleasures of handball - and this is only the beginning!
As experience is gained, the pleasures of manual stimulation
of the prostate gland, bladder and other internal organs
begin to reveal themselves.
As the rectum is gently stimulated by the top, the spasmodic
response increases and creates the anal orgasm. The anal
orgasm is similar in many ways to the spasmodic response
involved in penile orgasm, except that it can last for a
much longer period of time; literally for hours if you
(and the top) have the stamina!
<Back to the Table of Contents>
X. A Note on the Penis
In handballing the penis is not the center of attention, the
ass is. Although most men experience erection and have penile
orgasms (often multiple) simultaneously with the anal orgasm,
some men do not and others have penile orgasms only some of the
time. It is sometimes difficult to coordinate both sets of responses,
and this is particularly true at the beginning. The anal orgasm is
very satisfying in itself and, in fact, often pales by comparison.
Many men believe that penile orgasm is impossible during handball.
This is completely untrue.
Persons who know about handballing but have never practiced
it often believe that handballing does not produce an
ejaculation. To be sure, the more experienced handballers
may be more intrigued by the more gymnastic and sportive
aspects of the practice, in which the main objective is
not ejaculation but rather the extent of insertion
(frequently well past the elbow) or the ability to
insert two hands simultaneously (with the second hand
slid in next to the first). There are, however, many
handballers for whom ejaculation is the primary objective
and who desire to ejaculate as many times as possible in
an evening. (Navin, p 69)
As a final note, Tom, the gentleman that I mentioned earlier
who takes it to the shoulder, always has a penile orgasm.
Until you learn how your body responds, achieving a penile
orgasm may be difficult, but the 'work' involved is also
part of the fun.
<Back to the Table of Contents>
XI. The Pleasures of Topping
The greatest pleasure involved in being the inserter or
top in handball is the tremendous feeling of power that
one gets. It is not the feeling of power over another
person, but a feeling of power over the ability to give
another man such tremendous pleasure. It is truly
delicious to have another man moaning and groaning
in ecstasy before you, and it is visually exciting
to see your hand completely inside another man's ass!
It is not easy to be a good top, and in may ways the
role is more demanding than being a bottom. It takes
a lot of experience to be a good top for a good top
must be intuitively tune into the individual uniqueness
of the man he is playing with.
To be a top carries a great responsibility. There is
great pleasure in feeling capable of carrying out the
responsibilities of giving pleasure, making sure that
you are gentle and do not hurt your bottom, and in
being so totally trusted by another human being. It
truly feels like you have another man's life literally
in your hands, and in many ways you do.
Responsibility is the keyword in being a good top: the
top is both responsible for expertly giving another man
pleasure as well as making sure that he does not hurt
him. Although it is true many men first get involved
in handball as tops and then, as they become curious
about the intense pleasure that the bottoms appear to
experience, begin to learn how to bottom, I do not
completely agree with this notion. I, personally,
will not play with someone who is 'only a top'. I
simply cannot trust someone who has not experienced
being a bottom enough to let him enter me. I do not
believe that someone can be a good top unless he also
knows what it feels like to be a bottom. When there
is a fist in your ass you are in a very vulnerable
position and I would not entrust anyone with my body
who does not know firsthand what that vulnerability
feels like. Of course, this is different from someone
who prefers to top but has also bottomed.
A top is a man who finds the ass to be beautiful and
sexually exciting. A top 'gets off' on the feeling of
being completely capable of bringing another man to
the extremes of pleasure. When I top I often ejaculate
without directly stimulating myself, the experience
is so exciting.
An important rule for a responsible top is to always
do exactly what your bottom tells you to do, without
hesitation. Remember that he is at the other end of
your arm and undergoing intense sensations; let him
guide you as to your pace, positions, rhythm and
movement. As you become proficient at topping you
develop the ability to 'read' an ass. The bottom
will always communicate what he wants; this may be
verbal but is often sensory.
The hand is a very sensitive instrument. It is the
instrument that plays the piano, creates art, comforts
children, and performs surgery. When one thinks of the
sensitivity of the hand and the symbolic and psychological
functions that our culture ascribes to it, it is only
natural that it should be used as an instrument of
sexual stimulation.
A top develops the ability to sense every response.
A top can read the relative levels of tension and
relaxation in an ass and uses this information to
guide his actions. A top is patient. One of the
virtues of handballing is that it takes much longer
than other forms of sexual expression. A session can
last 2, 4 hours or more and often can go all night!
It is very important to always take all the time
that is necessary. Handball should never be rushed.
It is not a form of sex that is conducive to being
performed in backrooms. Patience is particularly
important if the bottom is inexperienced. The amount
of time necessary to massage an anus to an appropriate
level of relaxation can be considerable. On the other
hand an experienced bottom can be insatiable and never
want you to stop! A good top has a lot of stamina.
Communication is very important in handballing. Intimacy
plays a great role in handball and it is not appropriate
in an anonymous setting. It is advisable to talk with
your partner before you play. This allows for the
building of the very important bond of trust. Your
partner must learn that you can be totally trusted
and that your only intention is to give him pleasure.
Talking is particularly important if you are an
inexperienced top. If you are a novice, tell your
partner. If you have not developed the ability to
know what your actions are doing to your partner,
ask him to tell you. Do not hesitate to talk during
sex. Ask the bottom if he likes what you are doing.
An experienced bottom always knows what he likes, so
let him tell you. Honesty, openness, and sincerity
are important qualities that will immeasurably
reward you.
A top always makes sure that his fingernails are well
manicured. The hand, especially in the form of the
fist, is rarely capable of causing injury. The nails
are the only potentially dangerous parts of the hand.
The next best thing to having the fingernails removed
(or wearing rubber gloves) is to keep them short and
smooth. A top should clip his nails as short as possible
and then use the finishing side of an emery board to
smooth and bevel the edges. file the nails at a 45x
angle to bevel them smooth.
How can you tell if your nails are short and smooth
enough? If you can successfully scratch your head or
pick up a dime, your nails need more work.
<Back to the Table of Contents>
XII. The Pleasures of Being a Bottom
The feeling of a fist entering an ass has been described as
being similar to giving birth. A close friend of mine who
is both an M.D. and a handballer theorizes that one of the
motivations to handball may be a jealous to the ability of
women to experience the incredible sensation of childbirth.
Another man has told me that to him handballing is experiencing
his own birth. It does appear to hold the sensation of reaching
back through time and of somehow returning to the womb. There
is a very comforting and protective feeling, as if contact is
made with some primitive, archetypal thread of life. The facades
of civilization are dropped and the 'self' becomes more than
just the lone, solitary human being making his quotidian way
through his allotment of time.
The very first time that a fist made its way into my ass -
after several months of trying - the feeling was one of an
excruciating tension that was dramatically released at the
moment of full insertion, and then was transformed into a
soft, intensely joyous sensation of total submission. It
felt as if I had relinquished control over my life to the
man who occupied my ass with his fist, and I had. The first
man to fist me was my lover and that increased the sensation
of submission. Just as the unborn child is completely
dependent on the mother, so I felt with my lover. It was
the first time in my life that I had successfully unburdened
myself of all the stresses of life. In submission there is
a great sense of freedom; in the release of control to another
person there is a great sense of being cared for. In the
primitive sensations of the bowels there is an answer to
the question "Who am I?" Since that day I believe
that I have become a more complete person. I now approach
life with greater awareness and the childlike sense of awe
and wonder that I had lost on the way to adulthood was
somehow restored.
As I gained experience and made my way through the world
of handballing, I soon learned that there are two types of
handballers. To some it is just another physical act. For
these men, handball does not lead to self-knowledge or human
community. The other type of handballer is one for whom handball
is not only physical but potently psychological (or spiritual,
if you are of that bent).
Handball has provided me with many close and intimate friends.
Men who have shared the deepest part of themselves with me
and have allowed me to express the depths of my being to them.
In terms of my relationship with my lover, handball has deepened
our respect for one another and has allowed us to reveal more
of our individual selves to one another. This has not occurred
without some trauma and near breakups, but along the way we
have been able to almost completely drop that cloying
possessiveness and jealousy that marks the exclusive,
monogamous relationship. I have always felt that monogamy
was detrimental to relationships (gay or straight), but
how do you overcome the jealousies and insecurities that
come with experimentation? Oddly enough, handball has
provided an answer. It has allowed us to extend the
concept of love so that it can include others in a
positive and rewarding way. The friends that I have
made are almost as much lovers to me as the lover
that I live with. Just as my own lover would be by
my side in time of need, so would these other men.
How can you tell the difference between the two types
of handballers? You look into their eyes. In the
beginning I could not tell the difference between
the two, possibly because I did not know that handball
went beyond the physical. I wondered why I could have
sex with some men and come away feeling decadent,
debased and perverted while with some other men I
felt strong, alive and even wholesome. I wondered
why with some men the act felt difficult and even
painful, more work than play, while with other men
it was completely pleasurable, effortless and fun.
I wondered why some men made me want to run and hide
while others literally made me want to cry for joy.
When you look into a man's eyes you can tell if he
can be entrusted with your body. If you do not
completely trust the man, your ass will not open
up to him - it's as simple as that. There is nothing
like the sensation of being literally in the hands
of another man; someone who is totally focused on
you, completely reads your responses, and intuitively
reacts to them in away that not only brings you intense
physical pleasure but allows you to learn about yourself
and to love yourself.
<Back to the Table of Contents>
XIII. Some Thoughts on Being a Bottom
The physical sensations involved in being a bottom are
very intense. This is very true for the novice as these
feelings are totally new. A point may be reached where
you wonder if what you are feeling is pleasure or pain;
this is not because the sensations are inherently painful,
but because they are so new that you have not been able
to categorize them. The best rule to apply as you experience
these new feelings is if it feels like pain, then it is pain.
At this point stop, at least temporarily. It takes time for
the body to learn about this heightened degree of physical
sensation that you are putting it through. It helps a lot
to consciously keep your breathing slow and steady.
Many men resort to using drugs - pain killers and deep
muscle relaxers - during handball. This is unnecessary
and contradictory to the purpose of the act. Why blot
out the very feelings that you are trying to experience?
The sphincter muscles as well as the muscle wall of the
rectum are designed to stretch. As with all muscle groups
they need to be exercised and trained to meet the new
demands being placed upon them. Take the time to let your
body teach you about itself; allow yourself to experience
all the feelings that handball has to offer. You have all
the time in the world and a slow pace will be eminently
safer and ultimately more rewarding.
The early experiences of handball are unique. As you
become more experienced and learn how your body responds,
the handball experience becomes something totally different.
Although it remains very rewarding and satisfying, the
feelings that you get when you are first starting out
become lost and are never again to be regained. Don't
throw these away by misusing drugs; cherish and enjoy
the learning process.
As the anal muscles learn to stretch to the 10+ inches
of circumference of a hand, there may be a point where
there is real pain. Have your partner pull out some and
spend more time gently massaging the muscles or stop
completely and pick it up in another session. There
is no rule that says you must be able to take a fist
the very first time you try. In fact, I only know of
2 men who claim to have done so. It can take 6 months,
a year or even longer before a person can successfully
accept a fist into his rectum.
If you are a novice, let your partner know. If he is an
experienced top, he will know how to approach you. He
will adjust his tempo and actions to your body. Handball
is not a game of dominance and submission, and control
over the situation is always in the hands of the bottom.
A good top will stop whenever you tell him to and will
follow your every direction. Do not be afraid to talk
or ask questions. Pain is not a part of handball, but
learning new feelings can take time. Do not force
yourself to go beyond your limits for any reason.
<Back to the Table of Contents>
XIV. Fear and Trust
The fear of being injured has a lot to do with how much your anus
will relax. This fear never completely goes away and that is probably
for the good since it acts as a controlling factor. Fear, however,
is exhibited as anal tension. If you are very much afraid, there
is no way that your body will allow a hand to enter it. Just as
muscles need time to learn, you also need time to learn that you
will not be hurt. This comes from experience and is not accomplished
overnight.
Talking to other men is very helpful. The most convincing evidence
as to the relative safety of handball is the men who practice it.
Every sensible handballer has some fears and anxieties. It is
very reassuring to listen to other men talk about their early
experiences. You learn that you are not alone in your fears
and that everyone has gone through very similar experiences.
The ultimate pleasure in being a bottom is the experience
of total physical release and relaxation. This is as much
psychological as it is physical. At the moment that you
allow a hand to enter your ass, the moment you allow you
allow yourself to experience the intense sensations
involved in having your anus slide down a hand and
close around a wrist, you must make a mental commitment
to another man. The handball experience is based on trust.
A bottom must be able to trust the top with his very life.
This is not something that everyone can do. A top shares
a great degree of intimacy with his bottom. After all,
the bottom is, in a way revealing his very soul to him.
Finding a person with whom you can share this intimacy
and trust is very rewarding. Handball allows you to drop
all facades and just be you. In handball the bullshit of
life disappears.
<Back to the Table of Contents>
XV. Handball Anyone? Finding a Partner
If you are a novice at handball the best thing to do is
find an experienced person who is willing to take the
time to train you. To have one person with whom you can
develop an open and trusting relationship is invaluable.
Although, for obvious reasons, many bottoms do not like
to play with inexperienced tops, there are many tops
who take great pleasure in being able to train a novice.
Just as a novice bottom may fear getting injured, so a
novice top may fear hurting someone else. The point
of handball, like all other forms of sex, is pleasure.
It takes time to develop the surety of knowing that you
will neither get hurt or hurt someone else. Insecurity
can be quickly overcome if you have an experienced teacher.
If there is no experienced person available, the next
best thing is to explore handball with another novice.
A lover or friend who also wants to explore this form
of anal stimulation can be a rewarding partner. If
you approach handball with the respect that it requires,
are willing to take the necessary time, and apply the
gentleness and care, you will not hurt one another and
will soon learn what it is all about.
If your circle of friends does not include either of
the above, you might want to locate the local chapter
of FFA or a similar group. The FFA usually meets in
one of the city's more popular leather bars. One of
the aims of the FFA is to provide a method of meeting
people who want to safely explore handball.
<Back to the Table of Contents>
XVI. Preparing for Handball
Douching. In addition to being a primary sex organ,
another physiological role for the anus and rectum
is one of elimination of the body's waste material.
Due to this, fecal material can be encountered during
handball unless the precaution of taking a complete
enema is carried out. Although I had been douching
long before I became involved in handball, it appears
that this basic hygienic procedure is not a standard
procedure for everyone. Feces can carry many germs
and get in the way of enjoyment. One cannot enjoy
handball unless one feels sure that he is completely
clean. It is terribly unclassy to present yourself to
a top undouched. In addition, the intense anal
stimulation that is involved in handball can cause
waste material from the upper part of the intestines
to move down into the rectum.
Douching can be carried out in a number of ways. A hose
attached to the shower head or faucet with a valve to
control the flow of water is the most popular method.
This can be created with parts purchased from a hardware
store. A commercial product called the Shower/Bidet does
the same thing and comes complete with attachments. It
costs about $45 and is available both in bookstores and
by mail order. Other devices for douching include the
ever popular enema bag and syringe, which is very
convenient for traveling. Enema bags are available
in any drug store as are syringes. Preparations such
as Fleet, etc. are not recommended. They contain
chemicals that, over time and with continual use
will damage the sensitive tissue of the colon. Use
only plain warm water. Techniques of douching are as
many as there are men. Basically you want to let the
water run around until it runs clear. Over time one
develops an intimate relationship with one's bowels
and learns to tell when one is completely clean. A
novice at douching may find the procedure causes
discomfort and may even make the rectum so tender
as to not be able to have sex afterwards. This
occasion- ally happens to the experienced person
as well and there is really nothing that can be
done about it.
Although I do not know of anyone getting hurt by
douching, the medical literature contains more
warnings against douching than it does about
handball. Bear in mind that the tip of whatever
device you employ to douche with is a solid hard
object and treat it with respect.
Standard textbooks of nursing caution against
excessive enema pressure. The surgical literature
contains references to colonic ruptures from enemas,
and the senior author has seen two patients with
colons perforated during barium enemas. No respondents
reported injury from enemas with household tap water
pressure, a remarkable finding, considering such an
incautious and dangerous procedure. (Lowery, p 33)
The use of plain water enemas solely for the purpose of
cleaning the anus and lower rectum is harmless. Many
people find that the feeling of cleanliness which results
makes them feel more relaxed since they are no longer
concerned about encountering feces during anal play.
(Morin, pp 73-74)
Douching, therefore, may not be completely harmless, but
it is a necessary part of handball. One side effect of
douching may be dependence. Douching causes some people
to become dependent upon it for normal defecation.
Feces have the potential of spreading bacteria and disease
(amebiasis). This is particularly true if you are in a
group scene and play with more than one person during the
evening. Douching helps prevent the spread of disease. In
addition, always wash your hands thoroughly after a
handball session and avoid coming into contact with
your eyes or other mucous membranes until you do so.
The hand. The hand is a relatively blunt, rounded and
soft object and, unless great force is used, the only
parts of the hand that have the potential of causing
injury are the fingernails. Make sure that you clip
the nails and bevel them to a very smooth finish.
Lubrication. The most popular lubricant is Crisco (on
the East Coast; the West Coast seems to prefer Lube).
Whatever you use, make sure that it is pure and
additive-free and that you have lots of it. Crisco
does have and odor and can go rancid. Never use
rancid Crisco as it may damage the mucosal tissue.
During handball the hand and anus must be copiously
greased.
The Play Area. No special equipment is needed for
handball, just two men and a safe comfortable area
where you know that you will not be disturbed or
interrupted. Take the phone off the hook. Handballing
can be messy, as everyone and everything tends to get
covered in grease. Have plenty of paper towels
available in the play area. It may be a good idea
to limit the sexual activities to specific areas
or rooms, remove all objects and furnishings you
do not want to get greasy or at least cover them
with sheets, mats or towels. You may also want to
spread towels on the floors. Mover's pads are popular
and protective. You can get them from mover's supply
houses and they cost about $10-$15 each and are
about the size of a double mattress. They are
available in designer colors. To wash the grease
off of your body use dishwashing liquid.
Toys. No special toys are needed for handball, but
many people like to have variously sized dildos
available for the opening moves. The only piece
of equipment that I personally like is the sling.
Although the sling can be visually overwhelming
and may conjure visions of S&M, it holds the
body at the right height, provides support, and
presents the ass in a manner that facilitates
entry.
Drugs. Everyone has to make his own judgment as
to whether or not to use drugs and what types.
The evidence is quite clear that serious injury
only occurs when the participants are drug-intoxicated.
Avoid blotting out your senses and use common sense.
The body. Handball will not destroy your body. There
are many beautiful muscular men who handball. Maintain
your exercise regime and you will stay as beautiful
and attractive as ever.
Health. Although it is important to eat right and
make sure you get your vitamins, there are no special
health precautions necessary for handball. Many
handballers do, however, maintain a megavitamin
regime that includes large doses of vitamins C,
E and B. In addition some men eat yogurt or take
acidophilus (available in health food stores) to
help replenish the bacteria of the intestines. A
doctor who reviewed this book told me that it is
almost impossible to obliterate the bacterial
flora of the intestines and that other than
following a normal health regimen, nothing
special is required.
Techniques. Once inside the rectum, there are a
few basic techniques that can be used to stimulate
the ass. The most important thing is to do what
feels safe and natural and pay very close attention
to the bottom's responses. Other techniques include
the twist, shimmy, piston, and the bellows. The
twist involves rotating the fist in a circular
motion so that the anus rubs against the wrist
and the rectum rubs against the changing bulk
of the fist. The shimmy is carried out by rapidly
vibrating the fist. The fist is not moved, just
vibrated. The piston involves moving the fist in
and out of the rectum in a fucking motion. Advanced
players often enjoy having the fist come completely
out and then back in. The bellows involves opening
and closing the fist slightly in order to increase
the feeling of bulk.
Depth. Going in deep into the anus opens up a whole
new set of sensations and allows for the stimulation
of the prostate gland and other internal organs.
Although many men can and do go to the elbow and
beyond, most men find it difficult and painful to
go beyond the sigmoid curve. The rectum and colon
are naturally curved and the top must always follow
that natural curvature and never apply force. Going
in deeper requires that the hand be opened and that
the rectum be allowed to slip over the fingers which
are kept bunched together. Only the pads of the
fingers are allowed to massage.
S&M. Many people believe that handball is an
S&M activity. This is untrue.
Although in some instances there is indeed a
crossover between S&M and handballing, most
members of each group limit their activities to
their own special activities. (Navin, p 69)
The image of a fist in an ass is a visually powerful one
and it is no wonder that handball has become mistakenly
associated with S&M. Although some men who are into
handball are also into S&M and vice versa, handball
is not inherently an S&M act. In spite of its powerful
imagery, handball is a very gentle and caring form of sexual
expression.
Urine. During handball, the bladder, which is located directly
above the rectum, becomes stimulated, and may create an intense
need to urinate. Since the experience requires letting go and
relaxing the anal and urinary functions, you may involuntarily
urinate. Taking the precaution of urinating before beginning
sex play will help avoid this. If you should urinate during
sex play, it is nothing to worry about or be ashamed of.
Have paper towels handy to urinate in, or, if the environment
allows for it and you enjoy a little water sport, just let
it fly.
Injury. If an injury occurs, there is often some pain or
discomfort at the moment as well as the presence of blood.
If the injury is a perforation, cramping will occur after
a few hours and a trip to an emergency facility is necessary.
The presence of blood may not, however, indicate serious
injury. There are a number of things that may, on
occasion, cause blood to appear.
-
Muscles develop through a process of breaking down and
rebuilding. As the anal muscles learn to stretch, the
tissue may tear and cause blood. This is usually not
serious and will repair itself. Take a rest from sex
play for a week or two.
-
If the rectum is sensitive, as from a difficult douche,
handballing may irritate the tissue and cause some
small blood vessels to break.
-
Hemorrhoids and anal warts become irritated during
handball and can bleed.
Since you may not be able to distinguish between the
presence of blood that may require medical attention
and the presence of blood that does not, it is best to
play it safe. Stop your activity immediately. Check
the area every few hours to make sure the bleeding
has stopped. If bleeding continues to the next day,
see a doctor. The presence of blood is no reason to
panic; it is rare but not uncommon. Of course a top
must always tell his partner if blood is present after
sex play.
<Back to the Table of Contents>
XVII. Going All the Way: A True Story
It was at the first meeting of a writers workshop at
the New School that Bob first saw Sam. Bob was instantly
attracted to the athletic looking man who sported a red
hanky in the back left pocket of his Levis. It wasn't
until the last meeting of the workshop, however, that
Bob finally got up the courage to introduce himself to
Sam. It turned out that Sam had also been attracted to
Bob. They made a date for dinner for the following Friday.
That Friday Bob was beside himself. "It'll only be
dinner this time, that's all. We'll talk and get to know
each other." He told himself. "If we do play,
it'll just be 'normal' sex." Yet Bob went out and
bought a three pound can of Crisco, extra rolls of paper
towels, and a new bottle of amyl nitrite.
Bob met Sam at Ty's on Christopher Street and from
there they went to Trilogy, a gay restaurant. During
dinner they had the opportunity to talk quite a bit
and to learn about each other. Bob began to relax a
bit. Sam was an aspiring playwright and they had a
very intense conversation about the relative merits
of fiction and theater. Bob learned that Sam was
intelligent, sensitive, and sane.
When Bob ordered his third Black Russian, Sam realized
that Bob must be very nervous.
"It's none of my business, Bob, but there's no need
to drink so much," and Sam added with a smile,
"Especially if we are going to play together later.
I don't want you drunk. That's no fun at all."
Bob realized that Sam was right, "I'm just a little
nervous, that's all."
"Nervous about what?"
"Well . . ."
There was a pause in the conversation. Sam lit a cigarette
and looked Bob directly in the eyes.
"Have you ever tried fist-fucking?"
Bob nearly choked on his Black Russian. "No," he
blurted out, "I mean, not really. I've been curious
about it and sort of tried it a couple of times. I've
experimented with a good friend of mine but I've never
been able to go all the way. I guess that I'm afraid of
getting hurt and of hurting someone else." Bob
took a deep breath, "I mean it's dangerous, isn't
it?"
Sam chuckled. "There's no denying that it can be
dangerous. If you just do it with anyone who happens
along and waste yourself with alcohol and drugs, then
you're asking for trouble. I've been doing it for 7
years and I've never been hurt. I've never hurt
anybody else either, and I don't ever intend to."
"Seven years!"
"Yup. You see, I always make sure that I play with
someone that I can trust. Handball is not an activity
that I do with just anyone, nor is it something that
I do every day. I enjoy all types of sex play. With
handball, I have to be sure that the person I play
with will be careful and respect my body and my mind.
Handballing has to be approached with a lot of respect.
Under those conditions it can be a lot of fun. Not
dangerous at all.
As the conversation continued and Sam explained to
Bob that the ass was like an accordion, folded upon
itself so that it could stretch, and about the
precautions that one must take, Bob's anxieties
and fears abated.
"Bob, why don't you come to my place tonight
and we'll . . . experiment, OK?"
Bob hesitated, "I don't know . . ."
"Listen. It's your choice, I'm certainly not
going to force you. I'm not into pain. S&M is
not my game. In this sport there's an unwritten,
but very real contract of mutual consent and respect.
When you say stop, I'll stop. When you say go, I'll
go. You control it, OK?"
Bob realized that Sam was the man he had been looking
for. With Sam, he knew that he would be safe and the
overwhelming curiosity that he had built up in himself
about handball could finally be satisfied. "OK
Sam, let's go."
Sam's loft apartment in the West Village was beautifully
decorated in high tech fashion. They sat on the carpeted,
raised platforms that made up the sofa and the bed, smoked
a couple of joints and drank apple juice. While Bob douched,
Sam covered the furniture with furniture pads and
strategically placed Crisco, poppers, and paper towels
in the play area that abutted a wall of mirrors. Sam
lit a few candles and put on soft rhythmic music.
Naked, the two men held each other in strong embraces,
nearly squeezing the air out of each others' lungs. They
kissed with hard, masculine force. Sam massaged Bob's
body. He began with the muscles of the head and neck,
then the shoulders, arms, back, buttocks, chest and
legs. With Bob on his back, Sam grabbed hold of Bob's
balls and began gently rubbing them in the palm of his
hand. Slowly, Sam began to apply a little more pressure,
and then a little more on Bob's balls. As he played
with Bob's balls, he began to suck his hard turgid
cock. With slow, easy, long motions, Sam traveled
the length of Bob's cock until the whole 8 inches
was down his throat. Bob was in ecstasy. "Oh
shit, I think I'm going to come. That feels so
good, so good. . .!" Sam kept Bob in a state
of exquisite torture, bringing him oh-so-close to
coming and then changing the pattern or rhythm just
enough to stop it. Bob moaned as Sam manipulated
his balls and his cock in such an expert fashion.
Sam began sucking Bob's balls. He sucked them deep
into his mouth and then let them slip out. Again
and again he did this, heightening the state of
Bob's pleasurable agony. With Bob's wet hairy
balls in his mouth, Sam began to eat Bob's asshole.
Bob's puckered hole excited Sam so much that his
own cock was in a state of throbbing hardness. Sam
began to lick Bob's hole getting it all wet with
saliva. He alternately sucked Bob's asshole and
then would push his tongue as deeply into it as
he could. He loved to eat ass and Bob's ass was
a tasty morsel indeed! Spreading Bob's cheeks with
his hands, Sam went to town on Bob's ass. With
his tongue working the saliva deep into Bob's
ass, Sam massaged Bob's hole until it began to
pulse, almost begging to be fucked.
Pushing Bob's legs into the air, Sam grabbed some
Crisco from the nearby can and greased up his
throbbing cock. Placing the head of his cock
against Bob's anus, Sam, with deliberate slowness,
gradually pushed his cock into Bob's ass until
his own balls rested against Bob's ass. Sam
increased the speed of his fucking until he
was literally pounding Bob. His cock would go
deep into Bob's ass, his pelvis would bang
against Bob's, and then he would pull it all
the way out, and then thrust it in again and
again and again.
"Oh Jesus! I'm gonna come!" Bob exclaimed,
breathing heavily, "I've gotta come!"
Sam slowed down and then pulled his cock out completely.
"Not yet, Bob, not yet. There's more to come...
a lot more!"
They took a short break then. They shared another
joint. "How're you doing, Bob?"
"Just great. You're fabulous. That was wild!"
"You've got a beautiful, fucking ass, Bob, really
beautiful. And I think that it is ready for what is
coming next."
Bob looked deeply into Sam's eyes. There he saw the
great pleasure that Sam was having and he also saw
the deep respect and care that Sam had for him.
With Bob lying face down on his stomach, Sam began
to massage his ass with his hand. Using plenty of
Crisco, Sam worked the outer folds of Bob's anus
with swirling motions of his fingers. Slowly Sam
inserted one finger and then two into Bob's anxious
ass. He spread his two fingers apart to form a V
and continued to swirl his fingers until the muscles
of Bob's anus began to loosen and relax. "Turn
over." Bob turned over onto his back.
With Bob's legs raised into the air, Sam put in three
fingers of his left hand. With the pads of his
fingers he massaged the walls of Bob's rectum
spreading Crisco around inside as he did so.
"Oh God, that's intense!"
"Are your OK, Bob?"
"Yeah. It feels great, just great."
Sam continued the massage. When he felt that Bob
was ready, he inserted a fourth finger. Always
being careful to follow the natural curve of
Bob's rectum and of avoiding putting any force
against the walls or of pushing against the hard
coccyx bone, Sam spent a long time working out
Bob's ass. After about 45 minutes, Sam had four
fingers in Bob all the way to the crux of the thumb.
"I've got you ass now, baby, feel it? I've
got your ass in my hand."
Bob looked into the mirror. The image of the two
naked men reflected there excited him. "Yeah,
I can feel it. It's wonderful. Take my ass Sam,
take it!"
Sam took his hand completely out of Bob's ass.
While Bob, legs to the sky, watched, Sam theatrically
spread a large handful of Crisco all over his hand
and wrist. Sam extended his hand to Bob. "Feel
my hand." Bob reached over and felt Sam's
greased hand and smoothly manicured fingers.
"It's real smooth, Bob, I'm not going to
hurt you. It'll feel real good." Looking
directly at Bob, Sam smiled a reassuring smile.
Once again beginning with one finger and then two,
Sam worked at Bob's ass, gently forcing it to relax
and release itself to him. Soon Sam had four fingers
and the thumb inside the palm into Bob's ass. Reaching
the point of maximum stretch, Bob moaned loudly.
"Oh God, I don't know if . . ."
"Just relax Bob. Think of it as going out
instead of in and keep your breathing deep, steady
and even." Bob followed his directions.
"Holy shit what's happening! Aaargh!" Bob
was in intense ecstasy as his anus slid down Sam's
greased hand. He could feel Sam's hand as the folded
fingers completely formed a fist in his ass. "Oh
God, oh God!" The feeling of relief was immense
when his anus finally closed around Sam's wrist.
"You did it, Bob! You took the whole thing!"
Sam's own cock throbbed wildly, on the verge of coming,
at the sight of this virgin ass on his fist.
"Oh God, I don't believe it!" Bob moaned.
The reflection in the mirror proved it, however,
and Bob was incredibly turned on by the sight of
the muscular man whose arm extended to his ass
and whose fist was completely out of sight.
"That's really intense, Sam."
"Yeah, it is. I know. I'm going to keep
my fist completely still. Feel your ass
adjust to it."
Bob was in excruciating ecstasy. He didn't
know what to make of all these new feelings.
He could feel his rectum dilate and adjust to
Sam's fist. Very slowly, Sam began to move his
fist inside Bob's ass. He turned it slowly to
the right in a twisting motion. The feeling of
Sam's wrist rubbing against his anus and of
his fist rubbing against his prostate was
very intense. "Oh God, that's really
incredible!"
"You're ass is incredible. . . beautiful!
How I love to see a man writhe and moan at the
end of my arm!"
As Bob approached orgasm, Sam speeded up the
movement of his fist just a little, matching
his pace with Bob's masturbatory strokes.
Although Bob didn't completely realize it, he
was experiencing an anal orgasm. His ass was
in spasm, alternately relaxing and then tightening
around Sam's fist. "Aaargh," Bob
exclaimed as he brought his turgid dick to
orgasm and shot what seemed like a gallon of
hot, creamy cum all over himself.
Sam grabbed his own throbbing cock with his
right hand and with just a few strokes came
all over Bob. "Oh God, unghh, unghh!"
The spastic breathing of the two men began to
slow. Bob looked into the mirror and saw Sam's
arm reaching into his ass. He reached down to
feel his ass and the wrist that extended from
it. "Holy fucking Christ! That was great!"
But now that it was over, Bob felt like he needed
to get Sam's hand out right away. His ass began
pushing on Sam's hand as if he were taking a
real big shit.
"Slow down, slow down" Sam said,
"don't push it out. You could hurt
yourself that way. Take it nice and easy.
Breath deeply and relax. Let it come out
the same way it went in. Your ass will let
my hand come out all by itself."
Bob followed Sam's directions. Sam's hand slid
out, but the intensity was almost as great as
when it had gone in. He moaned and groaned
loudly as he released Sam's hand from his ass.
Bob sat up and clutched Sam tightly, nearly
crying with joy. "That was wonderful,
thank you!" Bob couldn't believe the
feeling of closeness and intimacy he had
for this man whom he really hardly knew.
"My pleasure entirely, I assure you."
Sam held Bob tightly knowing what it felt like
to be fist-fucked for the first time. "I
think you've had enough for one night, but
next time you're going to experience the
wonders of my ass, too!"
"I can't wait!"
Bob stood up. "It's a miracle, I can
walk!"
Sam laughed a deep resonant laugh. "You
asshole!" he said as he threw a pillow
at Bob.
As they gazed into each others eyes, the two
men knew that they would be friends for a long,
long time.
<Back to the Table of Contents>
XVIII. The Survey
[NOTE: The address given below is *not* valid. -- Fetish Alliance.]
The greatest frustration that I encountered in writing this
book was obtaining valid, substantial statistical information.
In the course of the 7 months that it took me to do this book,
I found only 2 surveys, both of which are wanting due to the
small populations involved and the particular bias of the
surveyors.
In order to rectify this and update the information to be
contained in future printings, I am conducting my own survey.
In addition, I am sure that you, the reader, will be able to
provide many details that I have overlooked.
It is very important that as many people as possible
complete the survey, and I would greatly appreciate
your taking the time to do so. If you would include
your name and address I will be happy to send you
the results.
Please feel free to:
Although the essay section is optional, your taking the time
to complete it would be greatly appreciated.
Please return the survey to: R.A. Fournier, 23 West 73rd
Street, New York 10023. If you would like a copy of the
results, please include your name and address.
<Back to the Table of Contents>
-
Your first name or initials
-
Your age
-
City and State or City and Country
-
How long have you been involved in handball?
As a top? As a bottom?
-
Where do you usually handball? If more than one
location please indicate a % of time for each.
Own home? Friend's home? Private club? The
baths? Other?
-
What % of your handball activity occurs at
group scenes or parties? In one-on-ones?
-
What % of your handball activity takes place
with your lover? Close friend(s)? People you
meet at parties? People you meet at bars,
baths, etc. . .? Other?
-
What % of the time are you a top? a bottom?
-
As a bottom how deeply are you penetrated
(in inches)?
-
Do you enjoy getting double fisted, i.e.,
having two hands inserted simultaneously?
If yes, what % of the time do you get double
fisted?
-
Do you enjoy having other objects inserted in
you anus? If yes, please detail
-
What % of the time do you use drugs for handball?
Please list the drugs you use and the % of use
for each one
-
How long did it take you to learn to bottom, i.e.,
to completely accept a fist into your anus? You
may wish to detail this answer in the essay section
-
What % of the time do you douche before handball?
What type of equipment do you use?
-
Have you ever been injured during handball? If yes,
please give the details and include any medical attention
that you received
-
The Essay (optional). Please describe how and why you
became involved in handball. What does the handball
experience mean to you; physically, emotionally and/or
spiritually? Are their any techniques of stimulation
that you particularly enjoy (or dislike) as a top?
as a bottom? Please feel free to include a brief
history of yourself and to describe any feelings
or incidence that you would like to share
A very special Thank You to all of you who take the time to
complete the Survey.
<Back to the Table of Contents>
XIX. The Directory
[NOTE: The address given below is *not* valid. -- Fetish Alliance.]
At the request of many readers and in an effort to provide
the opportunity for men who approach handball with the same
respect for the body and the mind to get in touch, a directory
that lists the names and addresses of interested men is available.
The Directory is a completely private computer listing
available only to those listed. It is not sold to others.
The only information the listing contains is the names and
addresses of those wishing to be listed arranged by locality.
There is a one time charge of $5 that includes a copy of
the Directory. There is no charge for change of address or
for deletion. Changes or deletions can be done at any time.
Since the Directory is maintained on computer, it is
continuously updated. You may wish to order updated copies
of the Directory in advance. To do so indicate the interval
at which you wish to receive updates (monthly, quarterly,
etc... or note the months you wish to receive them) and
include $5 for each update.
For inclusion in the Directory, please write to: R.A.
Fournier, 23 West 73rd Street, New York, NY 10023. Please
include a statement that you are over 21 years of age.
" and a free brochure describing video and other
products please write to:
GRS
PO Box 3268 - Wayland Square,
Providence, RI 02906. "
|